BRB…CRYING FOREVER!

I’m going to spend the this post bitching about snow. Hey, it’s my blog I can bitch if I want. I’ve lived in the Boston-area my whole life. Like most kids, I loved snow (no school, no job, no responsibilities). Then adulthood came, and I was very much disenchanted by it. I mean, it really sucks when you have to risk life and limb getting to work! It also doesn’t help that I live on a hilly, narrow, and windy street. Driving on my street even sucks in the best weather and road conditions. I think it’s because it should really be a one way. Also, moving isn’t an option for us at this time. So there is that.

Every year we get clobbered with snow. I think, hey, maybe this winter won’t be so bad?! You’d think I’d learn to stop being so optimistic. Even if we do get a winter when the snow banks don’t take over 90% of the street, and I don’t have to flip my car into reverse when someone is driving the on-coming direction to the top of the street where there is (sorta) room to pull over, we get slammed even harder than the winter we last got slammed the worst in. I mean, seriously! When is this global-warming shit going to kick in?!

Not only that, I can no longer see when pulling out of my driveway or street. I’m not exaggerating when I say the snow banks are over 8ft tall on the side. To leave, I’ll have to ask Andy to stand in the middle of street as a look-out. Otherwise, it’s hold your breath and pray! I can’t handle this dare-devil shit. I like my car and not getting injured in a car accident. I’m glad that we have a driveway and garage to use though. There are a lot of people that park on the street (thus forcing everyone to play chicken when driving).

This past couple weeks we’ve been hit with over 4′ feet of snow. There is NO PLACE TO PUT IT! We live in the city, nobody has sprawling yards to throw this shit on. Normally, winter isn’t quite this bad here. But this is like “end of times”, and I sure as hell didn’t sign up for it. I’m hoping we get spared the plague of locust’s. When all this snow melts though, it will cause a great flood and I don’t know how to build an ark either. Needless to say, I can’t handle this anymore. At least if i lived in the Arctic, I’d expect the constant crap loads of snow.

I may seriously consider moving to Florida, even though the humid summer air would also feel suffocating. I wouldn’t be able to find a job in my field, but whatever. NO SNOW! I’m not normally prone to claustrophobia, but I feel suffocated when I got outside. I’m one snow storm away from licking grapes off the wallpaper. So basically tomorrow.

Dear Mother Nature, as a plea for the scrap of sanity I have remaining, NO MORE SNOW UNTIL I DIE OF OLD AGE…or get Alzheimer’s and forget who I am and that I hate snow. Please, can you do this?!!! While we’re at it, can we cancel the snow we’re getting every other freaking day?!! Nobody needs it, snow is a pointless form of precipitation and we have it by the metric ton right now. Thanks in advance!

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1 Comment

Filed under annoyances, funny, random, snow

One response to “BRB…CRYING FOREVER!

  1. Willowwisp

    We only got a few inches … and I hated it

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