Tag Archives: drama

SORRY, I CAN’T FIND A DOG SITTER 6 MONTHS IN ADVANCE

Bill

I guess it takes planning a wedding to figure out how nuts some people can be. While brides and grooms can go crazy under all the stress, family can also be a cause of drama. Not sure if I actually posted about this before. But I’m already typing. So, let’s go back to a little over a year ago when Andy and I were sending out wedding invitations for our September wedding. We sent the invites out in early June, giving people about 2 ½ months to respond in August. This detail is key. He has two first cousins that are sisters. We invited both, one of them is married and the other (we thought) was single. Since we wanted to keep the wedding small(ish) we didn’t offer a lot of +1’s out until we had a better idea of how many relatives from Italy were coming from my side. We gave a +1 to the cousin that is married for her husband, and didn’t give one to the (presumed) single sister. Now, had the cousin that didn’t get a +1 contact us, we could have added on. Let’s also preface this by saying, I’m not very “bridal” so I didn’t really brush up on wedding invite etiquette either. But, Andy and I aren’t formal people anyway. So we trust that if there were issues, people would tell us directly.

 Anyway, so a couple weeks go by and we get two RSVP cards back from each sister. They both declined, and didn’t offer any kind of explanation to us as to why they couldn’t go. Let’s keep in mind, they basically sent the RSVP cards back practically right away. So we find out from Andy’s mom, the married cousin can’t go because she couldn’t find a babysitter. Ummm, what?! You have like 3 ½ months to find one!! So that’s clearly a bullshit excuse right there. I don’t think the other sister really even came up with an excuse. But the theory is, they are upset she didn’t get a plus one. Which AGAIN, had someone contacted us directly, we could have rectified the situation.

Andy was upset about their immature behavior, and basically cut off contact with them. People fail to understand it’s someone else’s wedding, not their own. So the bride and groom can do whatever they want with their wedding. Since Andy cut off contact with them, it just leaves me, as their Facebook friend. I didn’t hear anything from them until recently. 

 It turns out, the other sister has a boyfriend. They got engaged recently, and have been planning their wedding. Well, she sent ME a message on FB telling me they set their wedding date. They selected THE SAME DAY Andy and I got married. I shit you not. She also was explaining the reasoning behind selecting the date. To be honest, I don’t really care that they picked the same wedding date as us, or the reasoning. Just find it funny, that they decide to tell us why they picked the same wedding date as us, but couldn’t offer to tell us why they couldn’t go to our wedding.

Andy wasn’t ever planning on going to their wedding to begin with after their behavior. So no sweat off my back. But the mere fact they have the audacity to think we would even GO to their wedding is asinine. Oh ok, sure, I’m going to go to your wedding when you both were such divas about mine? Sorry guys, I can’t find a dog sitter this late in the game.

So I declined their RSVP and mailed it back within days of getting it. I am not offering up any kind of explanation to them either.  Andy didn’t want to respond at all, but I don’t have any intention of adding more fuel to the fire. I also declined the wedding shower. I didn’t actually know when it was, because Andy tossed the invite before I could take note. But I did have the courtesy of letting them know I couldn’t make it. I am being polite to their invitations and messages, since I’m not interested in adding more drama. I don’t think they know about this blog either, otherwise I wouldn’t post my rant. But hey, I wish them well. Just don’t expect Andy and I to be part of their lives.  
 

 

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Filed under annoyance, annoyances, Uncategorized, wedding

PAYING THROUGH MY TEETH

My weekend (click to enlarge)

That email excerpt I sent to a friend pretty much sums up my situation. I had returned to town from my friends birthday outing and decided to attend the house party at his apartment. I had enjoyed exactly two sips of my beer before he backed into me by mistake thus forcing my beer to high-five my tooth. I bolted into the bathroom to inspect the damage. I was a bit shocked at the sight at first. My lip was bleeding a little making me look like I just ate a live squirrel with my awesome new snaggletooth, or possibly survived a zombie apocalypse. Once the initial shock and realization that I now look like hick wore off, I began to laugh. Boyfriend was perplexed.

 

“Why are you laughing?”

“If I don’t laugh, I’ll cry.”

“I am so sorry babe! (repeat x50)”


The next morning I left a message for my dentist. I tried to sound extremely upset, which probably only came off as slightly not calm. Acting is not my forte, folks. Not that it mattered, I knew I wouldn’t get a call back until Monday. I tried in vain to think of ways to hide my new found dental deformity.


1) Try to speak with lips curled under teeth. FAIL, it makes me almost lisp and sound like an old lady that dropped her teeth into the potato salad.

2) Try my hand at non-verbal communication. FAIL, I communicate verbally too well.

3) Try not to smile. FAIL, I smile to much. That needs to fucking change!

4) Acquire a fancy geisha fan and take a sudden interest in Kabuki. FAIL, I’m female also I’m not very good at being Japanese.

5) Paint my face white and become a mime. FAIL, pretend boxes freak me out and I still lose at pretend tug-of-war.

6) Steal Stephen Hawkings computer aided voice box. I never got to attempt this one, so I can’t consider it a failure.

7) Become a ventriloquist. FAIL, I hate dolls and I’m not good at being weird. Though, I am good at speaking  to (yelling at) uncooperative inanimate objects.

8 ) Try this?

This is how the tooth-impaired smile

This is how the tooth-impaired smile

FAIL, it makes me look like a Cheshire cat. Or is that a win?

Now I must go back to “watching” Inception. I have no idea what is going on right now, but I don’t think I would understand this movie even if I was paying attention. This may be another Netflix queue fail for me.

PS. My dentist is awesome and managed to squeeze me on Monday. No more dental drama for me and my post about failing!

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Filed under funny